Trust

You must be able to trust. The last thing I want to do is walk on egg shells because you can’t trust people. If you can’t trust me, you will be comparing me to somebody else and believe me, there will be no comparison, so don’t even try it.

I also have to be able to trust you. I will know soon enough if I can trust you and I will until you give me a real good reason not to. Quite often you will find that people who do not trust others often are those who can not be trusted themselves. Many people will see a reflection of themselves in others. For example, if you accuse me of something, you are thinking that what you are accusing me of is actually something that you may have done in the same situation. I’m not you, I’m my own person and I make my own decisions.

I had an ex that always accused me of cheating, because he was cheating on me. I had no idea, because I would never dream of cheating on him. It’s hard for me to recognize certain undesirable qualities in people because it’s not the way I think. Doesn’t everyone that says “I love you” mean they actually love you and have no desire to be with anyone but with the one they love? Well, I’m learning. I’m learning the hard way, but I’m learning.

My 20 year marriage fell apart because I couldn’t trust my husband. First he lost my respect, then he lost my trust, there was nothing left after that. You can not love someone you have no respect for. The same can be said for someone you can’t believe one word that comes out of their mouth.

I need to know I can trust you and I need to know I can count on you. I don’t ask anything of you I don’t do myself. You can’t have a solid relationship without trust. Hell, you could go away for a year, if I tell you that I love you and I’ll wait for you, that is exactly what I will do. I’d be counting the minutes, until we can be together again. I’m not asking for much, it’s all part of what it means to truly love someone.

This now leads me to my next entry on My List, Communication.